Skip to content

Hey Mama, I Promise We are on the Same Team Even if it Doesn’t Feel Like it.

I have a serious question and I need some clarity on it all...can we talk? I still struggle with making sense of this.

So, I became a Mom 9 years ago to our sweet boy named Carter and 2 years later our Caylee came into the world. At the time I was working in TV as a news anchor in Phoenix, AZ. When Carter was born I took maternity leave and returned back on TV after 3 months. Same happened with Caylee.

I had no idea what the hell a "Mommy War" was then but I quickly learned. I also learned there are acronyms for every type of Mom too...SAHM (Stay at home Mom), WAHM (Work at home Mom) etc. The title you got was almost automatic based on what you were "doing."

All of a sudden you were placed on a team of "working Moms" or "SAHMs" or "WAHM's" or whatever other team is out there that I am not familiar with.

This bothers me a lot. Like A LOT. I don't get it. I am by no means a tenured parent but in almost 10 years of this job as a Mama, I still don't understand the separation and the comparison we allow to happen. Why do we pit each other against one another? Why do we fault each other for a choice we have each made based on the needs of OUR family. A choice that has nothing to do with anyone but YOUR family.

Why have we allowed this to happen? The comparison and one-upping HAS to stop. And "I am better than you or work harder than you" has to end.

Why do we let society dictate the team we are going to run with? Sure, maybe you do work outside the home or you are full time working inside the home BUT aren't we all on the SAME team? Isn't the common denominator in these groupings one thing: MOM?

We wear lots of hats but the hat we all put on every morning is the one that says "MOM."  Your day may look different than hers or mine but aren't we all figuring out how to raise and guide these little humans? Can't we agree we can all be called Moms? YOU are great with our without your extra hats. YOU are great because YOU are doing a really hard and exhausting job.

Isn't our job description the same?

Aren't we all praying they are safe everyday?

Aren't we all hoping we lead them in love and kindness?

Aren't we all wishing they find their passion in this world?

Aren't we all hoping time would slow down so they don't leave us?

Aren't we all crying in our closets questioning our every move today?

Aren't we all hoping that they eat a vegetable for once?

Aren't we all wondering if they will ever remember to brush their teeth?

Aren't we all praying that they aren't bullied at school?

Aren't we all crying when we see Facebook memories pop up that feel like yesterday?

Aren't we all wishing that they pass their classes each year?

Aren't we all worried about the same things?

Not one of us wake up wanting to screw up our kids, lead them down a destructive path, or mess them up in some way.

We ALL wake up praying and thanking God first and foremost for the GREATEST gift ever, these humans.

We all wake up with hopeful hearts that today we will lead them a little closer to God, to love and to a life of peace.

And you know what, they, our kids, don't care what our acronym is or our titles, or how many zeros are on our paycheck or what our car looks like or who knows us in the world.

They just need their MOM.

The one that will eat ice cream with them when they are sad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The one that will celebrate them all the days of their lives.

That is you. That is me. We are MOMS. We play on the same team. We share the same struggles. We sit in the trenches together. We cheer on the same sideline. We run the same plays. We are MOMS and it's hard.

I don't care that you work inside the home, outside of the home, or half inside and half outside. I just need my fellow MOMS to recognize the glaring fact that we all have the SAME job. We have the MOST important job there ever could be in the world.

I don't need to compare my schedule to yours. I don't need to one up you on how you #momsohard. I am not interested in it.

I am interested in sharing in the delight and hardship that this job comes with.

I am interested in sitting with my fellow co-worker, you sweet Mama, and sharing in our challenges and our successes so we may lead these babes towards their greatness.

We all want to go out and change the world and we have that opportunity every single second of the day with them. What a responsibility, right?

We were all qualified by God to take this position. He looked at each of us and said "Here daughter, I am gifting you this handpicked child to lead into this world." He qualified you and me to do this.

We don't need to justify or reaffirm our worthiness or why we chose anything else. We just need to realize we are all playing on the same team.

Mama, I see you and I have a megaphone ready for ya on my side. Let's keep going...titles, accolades and all the stuff...I don't care about it, we just need each other.

 

 

 

 

 

10 Comments

  1. Kammema on January 30, 2020 at 7:54 pm

    You said everything so beautifully and every single word is so TRUE. Thank you for allowing God to use you to express what so many Mothers are feeling/have felt, but afraid to say it. It’s extremely important that we love and encourage one another, especially in this day and age. You’re a wonderful light in this world



    • Andrea Robinson on January 31, 2020 at 3:53 pm

      Thank you for being so kind and loving always sweet K! I have been thinking of you non stop. Praying for your achy heart everyday. Love you girl!! xoxo



    • Robyn on February 5, 2020 at 5:35 am

      I think you’re a great mom Andrea. I think what a person does for their family and children is a very personal thing, and should be protected within your family. It really is no one’s business but you and yours. That is how the comparison stops. So basically it is about boundaries with superficial people. You know if you are doing a good job or not.



      • Andrea Robinson on February 6, 2020 at 11:30 am

        I agree sweet Robyn! So true! xoxo



  2. Angie Cobler on February 1, 2020 at 3:26 am

    We just recently moved and im broke trying to get SSI can’t afford journal can I still do program with our it?



    • Andrea Robinson on February 6, 2020 at 11:32 am

      Come and join the community…no cost to that! We also offer a free 7 day trial of the journal. You can print the pages and just make copies to use as you start to develop the habit of this practice. http://www.andrearobinsontv.com/love



  3. Brittany Taylor on February 7, 2020 at 7:06 am

    Yes! Beautifully written! So very true! The judgement and competition has got to stop! We are all on the same team! Team MOM! Period!



    • Andrea Robinson on February 17, 2020 at 9:40 am

      YES YES YES! XO



  4. Kim on February 9, 2020 at 10:41 am

    I wish i had read this years ago. This is so true. As a SWM ( single working mom lol!!) I remember people’s children telling mine that there wasn’t enough supervision in my home, obviously passing judgement, as I felt I was more strict with my kids then others. I had to play the role of both mom and dad because my children’s fathers were absent . ( one a deadbeat t the other deceased) Not only that but, after my divorce not only did I “not supervise my kids well” I became a threat to those who were the mothers of my children’s friends and if I spoke to there husbands I was now “ flirting.” When we would all sit at a baseball game watching our kids together talking just fine before. So I totally get the “front row” and those friends that have stuck by my saide have been God Sent from above . I don’t know what I would have done without them!!!



    • Andrea Robinson on February 17, 2020 at 9:41 am

      It pains me that we all have these stories to tell…but once we realize we are on the same team, I believe things change for the better. It starts with each of us and I pray those women who treated you in that way are growing and have changed in the way they respond to other women. I see you and the journey you have been on…you are strong and amazing and I am sure your kiddos are a beautiful reflection of that!

      xoxo



257 Shares
Share
Tweet
Pin